Contested litigation is remarkably unsuited for healing a divorced family. One gets a sense of the feelings of frustration, if not helplessness a Family Court Judge may feel as she tries to figure out “what do we do next?” What remedy should be ordered that will actually strengthen the bonds between parent and children?

Consider the July 1, 2016 decision of Erie County Family Court Judge Mary G. Carney in Matter of Gregory S. v. Dana K. Judge Carney was charged with resolving the claims of a father, rejected by his four children in substantial part due to the mother’s willful violations of visitation orders.

Judge Carney noted that the family’s history was branded by protracted, caustic litigation, toxic interpersonal conflict and all categories of broken hearts.


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The father petitioned the Family Court for enforcement of his rights to visit with his 13-year old son. Alternatively, the father asked to suspend his child support obligation. Instead, Westchester County Family Court Judge Hal B. Greenwald granted the mother’s cross petition to modify the prior order of custody and visitation and suspended the father’s